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Coping with new baby

KatieA's picture
by
KatieA


Coping with new baby

Tue 1 Aug 2017 8:51am

Hello all,

I'm a first-time mum - my baby is currently 8 weeks old. My husband also has an autistic son, who is nearly seven.

We had our concerns about how his son would react to the new baby - and luckily he does love her and wants to be with her all the time. Unfortunately her presence really stimulates him, which makes home life very difficult - for example, he is constantly asking where she is, unable to leave the baby monitor alone, and cannot control himself from being very loud and 'in her face'. He can also get very overexcited and difficult to control, especially if she is crying, and he is much more needy and demanding, especially of my husband.

I was wondering if anyone else had similar experiences or any advice?

Thanks so much! Smile

 

 

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3 Comments

  • Peppa2017's picture

    hi Katie,  I am new to this site,  congratulations on the birth of your little girl by the way.

    my little grandson (who is undiagnosed with either autism or ADHD but we suspect one or both),  whilst my grandson is younger than your step-son, my grandson is 3yr 8 month, when he becomes excited he goes into a loud shrieking behaviour, we tend to laugh it off but I would imagine with a little baby nearby it isnt as easy to laugh off, my best guess at this one is that as he gets older and develops his emotions a little more, maybe they will manage the over excited bit better than whilst much younger,  sadly I am not sure there is a quick answer to this because emotionally I would imagine your step son is much younger in his years than his peers so its hard to ask him to understand that baby doesnt need the screaming around her, if he is anything like my grandson, we explain things one minute and think oh looks like he understood then an hour later its like that explaining didnt take place, we call it 'in one ear and out the other'  lol.  Judy x 

    Judy
  • CCaccavone's picture

    Hi Katie

    Congratulations on your new addition!

    There are lot's of tips here on how to support your son to manage his behaviour: http://www.autism.org.uk/about/behaviour/obsessions-repetitive-routines.aspx##help 

    Perhaps being very clear about when he can spend time with the baby and when he can't will be helpful; and sticking to the schedule that you all agree (insofar as possible). It may also be helpful to build a social story around emotions and communication: http://www.autism.org.uk/about/strategies/social-stories-comic-strips.aspx include pictures which can represent why the baby is crying and show how he can support the baby thorugh using his own, appropriate, communication. 

    I hope this is a helpful start and do let us know how you get on.

    Clare 

     

    Clare Caccavone, Head of Learner & Family Engagement at Ambitious about Autism
  • SherpaMum's picture

    Hi and congratulations.

    How does your step son cope with loud noises generally? The crying will be a sound overload, my son who is 10 still struggles with crying babies.  Have you got any noise protectors for his ears he could put on?

    enjoy your baby days, it is amazing how quickly they grow up!

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